My Chinese Family

     I feel that with each new entry I am always saying how I've just had the most wonderful experience and it cannot possibly get any better. While in it's own right that has not been an exaggeration since everything here truly has been amazing, there can really be no comparison of the past to the weekend I just had in Yueyang. If I have had a better experience, not only in China, but in the entirety of my life, the memory has been forgotten or diluted. This weekend was simply perfect.

       In the three days I spent in that small village in Hunan, I did not see anything to match the beauty of Guilin, the modernity of Shanghai, nor the history of Beijing and yet in all my time here it is the most happy I have been. There is sort of peace that is indescribable in that small town. We went to Hunan to see a traditional Chinese wedding, but we were treated to so much more. I fell in love with China in Yueyang. Though I live and have spent most of my time in Zhongshan and I love the people I know here so much, as much as I hate to say it, I believe that the bonds and friendships that I formed in Yueyang overshadow everything else. I did not just meet Candice's family; I became family. To me Candice is now "wo de jie jie" and to her cousins I am "mei mei."

      Initially, I was nervous to live in her home - to be constantly surrounded by her family, but now that I know better I would not have it any other way.  Each morning at the Liu's, I woke up at nearly 6:00 to the hustled sounds of people going about their daily chores and preparations: the dogs barking, children playing in the road, and the rooster's call. In Yueyang, the mornings are cool and relatively dry; the wind pours through the open doors and windows of the house, and the breeze practically cancels out any humidity. It reminded me of mornings waking up at my grandma Pom Pom's house in Wyoming.  Throughout the day we spent most of our time playing with Candice's young cousins. At first there were just three girls, but soon, because we were the first foreigners to come to Yueyang, we had a small band of children following us everywhere we went. Though they don't  speak my language, I have never had so much fun with children and teenagers their age. Our piecemealed conversations of broken English and Chinese became a game in and of itself, but when you are trying so hard to understand one another, there is almost nothing that you cannot communicate. Generally, the three original girls would play with us while the surrounding boys would just watch on and giggle or conspire against us. We played very simple games like hot potato and hand slapping/clapping games. but we also just had fun exploring the village, walking through rice and tea fields, eating random food brought to us by the children, and rolling down hills. Though the day had very little in common with the sort of day taken from my own childhood, I felt like a kid again. Everything was simple, more fun, and more exciting.

     One of the more baffling things about Yueyang, is the unusual passage of time there. It is the sort of place where when you look at your watch even though it feels like it must already be late afternoon because of everything you have accomplished, you are suprised to find that it is still only nine or ten in the morning. It is as though each minute is given an extra 30 seconds. Despite the extra time and the overall slow pace of the day, however, it never creates a feeling of boredom. Even in the moments when you are just sitting and talking with one another, or  watching the people around you, you honestly never once wish you were doing anything else. Melanie, one of Candice's cousins, often came up to us, concerned that we were not being entertained, and would sweetly ask "are you boring?" At first the question threw us off guard not only because of the interesting usage, but also  because there could be nothing more untrue; we were not bored in any way. I felt more "boring" in Beijing or Shanghai than I ever felt there.

      When we weren't playing with the kids we were either play mah jong or basketball with Candice's other older cousins and it was so awesome as well. We got trashed in the basketball department, but it was a good time regardless. As far as the wedding is concerned, it was much different than I was expecting. It really wasn't anything like an American wedding other than the fact that the bride wore a white wedding dress for a short time. There was no ceremony where they actually "became" married because they are married as soon as they sign the legal papers, which they do the day or week before. The wedding is mostly just a celebration where you eat way way too much food, drink milk drinks and beer, get a nice big bag of milk candy, and have fireworks. They have a few additional traditional customs like the entrance of the bridal party in a fleet of decorated cars or sharing each other's tea for the first time, but other than that the wedding is pretty simple. My favorite part was probably walking up the street with the bride and groom while we were accompanied by the drums, trumpet, and symbols played by Liu Ming's friends. There was just so much energy and I loved being there to be a part of it. 

       On our last day there we were asked to go teach at the school up the road. We had mentioned our willingness to do so to one of the teachers earlier in the weekend, but since we had not heard anything from him since, we assumed that we wouldn't be taken up on our offer. However, Monday morning as we were preparing our bags to leave, a woman walked into the room and started to speak with us in our own language. We didn't know why she was there at first, but after the initial chit chat, she explained to us that that morning when she went to school, her students told her that English teachers were coming to teach them. She had heard nothing of the sort, but not wanting to dissapoint them she asked around and was informed that three American girls were living down the road. Apparently without much of a second thought, she left her class, and came down to get us. Candice was as suprised as we were, but we figured that we had enough time to go teach a short lesson, and still make it to the bus to go to Yueyang tower in time. I am so glad that we did. That classroom, filled with nearly 30 13-16 year olds, was some of the most fun I have had in China. We introduced ourselves, played telephone, took pictures, exchanged QQ numbers, and when it was time to leave a few of the boys came up to me and asked if we could play basketball. I really wanted to, but I also knew that we didn't have much time left, nor was I even sure if they would be permitted to leave class. They were persistant in their efforts, so I finally asked Candice and their teacher Elaine if were allowed, and a little reluctantly they agreed. As I walked back to the group of boys, it was obvious that word had spread, and the entire class was waiting in anticipation for my answer. When I called out that we were allowed to play, it was like something straight out of a movie. The entire classroom cheered, jumped and then ran down the stairs to the court talking and yelling in anxious excitement the whole way. Initially, we just shot a few hoops, and the boys tried to show off, but then we had them split into teams, and we were actually able to play a short game. I was slaughtered by the boys - they were extremely talented, so I suppose it was good that we had to end early. Though the kids were devastated to have us leave, it was so much fun, and I left that court with the largest of smiles on my face. It is hard to describe what this weekend meant for me. Its brilliance was in the details. It was in the smells and the feelings - the smiles more than the activites. It just made me forget the world,  forget my troubles and remember to love. Such loving makes you live fully in every moment - nothing wasted, nothing lost.